The Blessings of an Epic Failure

I have failed more times than I can say.

I mean seriously, I have really fucked some shit up in my time.

No bullshit as we say here in DC.  I mean fucked.some.shit.up.

Failure promises to do a few things for us:

  • It will be our friend and teach us if we allow for it to.
  • It may also help us to grow.
  • Failures are those things that God has specifically designed in order to make us stop and think, look at ourselves and actions.
  • They make us talk to Him too.
  • I’ve pretty much realized failure is a blessing.  It can slow us down.  Protect us, correct us.
  • A good majority of the time, failures will also help us to help others.  Maybe we can save them some time at the end of the day and before they waste the same decade that we have.
  • I would be willing to wager that each of us are supposed to have a certain amount of failures in order to get where we need to get to.  Failure is a cause of re-direction.
  • If it doesn’t kill you, there’s room to learn from it.

My failures have been of epic proportion at times.  From botched relocations – wait until I tell you about my move from Birmingham to Baltimore.  Or should I save it for the book?  I digress.  Botched relationships, bad jobs and just over all  piss poor decisions I promise I have learned more from my failures than I have from my mistakes.

Please get this – I have not ever really learned a single damn thing from a success.  Other than it being successful.  Most of our lessons are from our own mistakes or watching and learning from others mistakes. 

I also know at this point in my life, I have fewer years to correct mistakes of epic proportion.  It doesn’t mean it can’t be done.  It means I need to be more calculated.  More precise.  I need to be able to make better decisions.

I was reading something in the blogosphere or internets somewhere and came across Dr. Randy Carlson’s 12 Steps for Making an Important Decision:

  1. The MISSION question: Does this decision support my life mission?
  2. The VISION question: Will this decision move me toward a life goal or toward solving a problem?
  3. The INTEGRITY question: Will this decision affect any commitment or vow I have made?
  4. God’s REVEALED WORD question: Does the Bible speak to this decision or a potential consequence?
  5. The COMMON SENSE question: Do the results of this decision make sense?
  6. OTHERS FIRST question: How will others be effected by this decision?
  7. The LEGAL question: Is it legal?
  8. The COST question: What will this decision cost me?
  9. The MOTIVE question: What do I get out of this decision?
  10. The TIMING question: Is this the best time to make this decision?
  11. The KNOWLEDGE question: Do I have enough information to make this decision?
  12. The COMMITMENT question: Do I plan to commit to my decision?

Some things, we need to think about.  We need to mull them over a little longer.  Let it marinate to so speak.  These questions?  I really believe they are an amazing guide (whether you are Christian or not) to meditate on when making a decision.   I also have to say – the mission question – did that stop anyone else in their tracks?  What IS my life mission?  Yeah.  We have to be able to answer it.

Rae note: Not making a decision is still a decision.  In this case you’re choosing not to make a decision which can have its own consequences.

I had thought about making the decision-making its own post.  But it goes right along with making mistakes of epic proportion right?  I was also thinking maybe this would help someone tonight as they were trying to make a decision.  Plus I didn’t want to be a tease – at least not tonight.

Don’t hate me because I’m awesome.  You’ll thank me later.

Love,

Rae

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