The Lost Art of Having a Seat (or Several)

I am a believer in having a seat.  In fact, I’m currently in posture of proverbial seat-having right now. Lately, I’ve been seeing all of this mayhem.  It especially seems to go down on Twitter where I can see real-time foolishness go down.  It’s entertaining and sad at the same time.  People do too much sometimes when what they need to do is have a damn seat.

So much would be resolved if I learned earlier to take my hands off of and out of situations and stop trying to manipulate the outcome.  These days, I may push a bit, but ultimately some things aren’t up to me to control or change.  Basically if it involves another human being, elements out of my control, then I’m learning to stop worrying.  What’s the point?

Verb – To have a seat. Definition:

  1. The lost art of sitting something out.
  2. The ability to sit still while also being at peace, not knowing the outcome.
  3. The ability to sit still, sit it out, sit down and keep ones mouth shut.
  4. The ability to do all of the above while maintaining a proper attitude.
  5. The ability to do all of the above while not having a proper attitude but a willingness to work towards it.
  6. The willingness to accept things as they are but to maintain one’s composure even when said situation cannot be changed.
  7. The ability to go and sit the hell down somewhere and accept the fact that it is what it is until it ain’t.
  8. The capacity to have peace and joy within a situation not to one’s liking.

I often decide to sit things out. It is the equivalent to being called off the field to ride the bench or sit in the dugout. But is that really so bad? From the sidelines, I can see the entire game. I can talk to the coaches, fellow team mates. It’s time for me to take in the other team, see what’s happening around me. Maybe get some Gatorade, maybe check and see if any of those old injuries are creeping up on me.

Mostly,  I have time to regroup from the time I’ve played on the field.  I go and re-group.  I participate in blogging challenges, I clean my house like I don’t have good sense.  I read or find other things I need to work on.  I cook new meals.  I talk to my friends and family.  I write.  I work on the direction of my life.   Having a seat can often be productive for me.  In fact, sometimes it looks to others as if I’ve “gone dark.”  They see my writing appear, they see me tweet but other than that I’ve cut myself off.   It’s because I am working things out.

Also, I had to learn how to allow others the space to have a seat as well.  It’s not about my timing on things.  It’s not always about me.  Rushing people and making demands never turns out well.  And really, it’s not Godly.  Raenote: If anyone tries to strong arm you into a rush decision on an important life issue you tell them to pump their brakes and give you some space and time.   The only time this doesn’t apply is in matters of life or death.  Otherwise?  Tell them to have a seat and wait.  Purchasing a house, getting married, getting treatment, having children, getting divorced, moving in together, breaking up, moving, quitting, getting another job?  These all require consideration and time and in no specific order of importance.

No matter what’s happening, sometimes I need to sit down and contemplate everything going on around me for a while. It helps me to make an informed decision. Having a seat doesn’t mean I have to by physically still.  It may mean I need to be still on a situation. I may need to shut the hell up.  I may need to sit the hell down and just stop.

Work hard, pray, try to do the right thing for my life and those I love – and believe the best will happen.

Hope carries a person far.




4 thoughts on “The Lost Art of Having a Seat (or Several)

  1. Dying @ the multiple definitions lmao This was such a relevant post for me right now

    Found your blog thru the #30in30 challenge and I admire how your posts all had some type of personal meaning w/ a universal delivery…I’m not gonna sit up here and lie like I’ve read every post LOL but I can just tell from the ones I did read that this was something that you took seriously in multiple levels, that’s mad respectable

    • LOL!! Thank you so much! I’m glad you stopped by and read the blog. Yeah – this #30IN30 got me the hell together… it was really great. I’m glad you stopped through!!!

  2. I am enjoying your 30in30 writing. I look forward to your emails! This article in particular spoke to me because I am guilty of “doing to much” right now. Reading this has made me realize I am going to take several seat NOW. Thank you!

    • LOL! Thank you Carmen!!! I swear, I have gotten to the point in life where I know (most times) when I need to have a seat. I’m so glad you enjoyed the posts! I was hoping I wouldn’t lose people in the process with all of the emails.

      But yeah, I’ve def been guilty of doing entirely too much when I needed to have a seat.


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